An amusing email exchange between myself and a friend that I drop-off at the bus stop every day. Before anyone thinks too highly of me, allow me to say that the bus stop is on the way to my own arranged stop and constitutes no sacrifice to me whatsoever. My friend is inordinately grateful, and expresses his gratitude daily. At any rate, I did not pick him up today, because I seemed to remember him telling me yesterday morning (almost too far to remember, certainly too far to remember clearly) that he would not need a ride today.
Me: You didn't need a ride today, right?
Friend: That's right. I'm working from home today. Is tomorrow still okay?
Me: Of course. I apologize in advance for being late. (*note: I'm always 5-15 minutes late, another sure sign that I deserve no credit for offering him a ride. Typically the first thing I say to him when he gets in the car is an apology for being late.)
Friend: I think my line is "It's fine." It really is not a big deal at all. I really appreciate your help. (*note: Indeed, this certainly is his line. He never fails to thank me and is the very picture of polite gratitude.)
Me: To be perfectly honest with you [Friend], it's really not much of an effort for me; indeed, I worry that I would not do it if it were more of an effort for me. True, on occasion it represents some minute sacrifice by way of not gelling with my schedule perfectly, but such "sacrifices" are usually on the order of 20 minutes or so, and, were I not such a whining-lackwhit-dullard, would not merit any discussion whatsoever. So, while the self-aggrandizing aspects of my psyche grossly prize all of your sincere appreciation, at moments such as these when my otherwise-submissive humility snatches control of my means of communication from my grotesquely vain self, I must confess that your heaps and loads of appreciation is, perhaps, misplaced. A simple thanks will do nicely.
Friend: Thanks.
Me: You're welcome, of course.
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